My Tonsillitis Torture (That actually turned out to be Glandular Fever)

Around ten days ago from today I began to feel lethargic and have a muzzy head. Muzzy meaning, a sort of headache, but not a skull thrashing one, the kind of pain in my head that I couldn't even distinguish. I presumed I must be fighting off a cold in its early stages as I had sneezed once or twice in the last few days. Wanting to enjoy my Easter break and see my friends from home I'd take a few paracetamol, that would lower any pain to an ebb and allow me to enjoy the evening. I'd then get home and fall into bed before the effects of the painkillers wore off.

This went on for another two or three days when I came to presume that I was losing my battle with the flu as the pain had spread to a rawness in my throat. I began to drink water like I'd just come out the desert and expected all other common cold symptoms to erupt out, cue the runny nose, trouble breathing and goodbye all ability to taste... but over the next few days these didn't come out. My throat was just getting more and more raw, my inner ear continuing some of that sensitivity but my nasal airways were completely clear. I'd never had simply a sore throat in complete isolation of any mucus mayhem and I just didn't know what was going on. I decided to wait it out a little longer before I worried about it being anything more serious. Over the five days that followed it was progressively unbearable to swallow any water, any food, no matter how squishy- the swallowing reflex is triggered regardless and it felt like shattered glass in my throat every time.

I began uncontrollably dribbling because I was very conscious of any swallowing and couldn't naturally, automatically swallow excess saliva (gross gross, I know). So it would just pour out while I was somewhere between asleep and awake and I, in horror, would wonder what was going on and have to bolt to the bathroom to spit out the rest.
In the night I'd get so sick of getting in and out of bed to spit out saliva I couldn't stand to swallow, I contemplated dragging my duvet to set up camp for the night on the bathroom tiles.
In between all of this my bones ached, my tongue had grown the most hideous fur coat and my temperature was through the roof. I'd fall asleep in a onesie with feet numb and goose bumps only to wake up with sweat dripping off me and changing into a vest top and shorts, hanging my head out the window. I'd take cold showers to cool down and hot baths to heat up, all in the same day.

I'd stopped functioning, when I spoke I sounded like I had a ping pong ball stuffed in my mouth, I just slept all day and I didn't even mind because I couldn't face anything else, I'd have Spotify playlists on really really low all day and all night, maybe a talk show from time to time if I felt lonely at not hearing any voices, but the brightness from any screen was so painful I couldn't bear to watch. Sleeping began to become a problem as whatever angle I fell asleep I'd wake myself up with the most awful, gentle snore erupting from my own mouth that would confuse me and frustrate me until I fell into an exhausted sleep.

A little look into my archive of 'Tonsil Patrol', you can see the bright redness at the back of the throat where it was so irritated and sore. If you look really closely you can see the white blobs sat on the tonsils that are so incredibly painful just being there!

 When I realised I'd essentially turned into a newborn baby (sleeping 18 hours a day, full of dribble, bad at controlling my own body temperature) I couldn't 'wait it out' any longer. I thought I'd just been given the mother of all flu viruses and there's nothing that I could do, but my symptoms were getting progressively worse so I did what any girl in their twenties would do, cry to my mum.

After a speedy trip to the doctors, the kind receptionist looked concerned and I was able to get an emergency appointment there and then. I sat in the GP's office, she wanted to have a look in my mouth, before I opened wide I apologised for the state of my tongue. She glanced in for less than a second before saying:
"You have tonsillitis, very advanced."

Call me crazy, but of all the possible diagnosis that I was not expecting.

 Of course the throat pain and inability to swallow was central to the whole feeling, but I think it was diluted by the bad fever, sore body, painful ears and bad head that the sore throat was just one of many symptoms in the end.

I was prescribed with a 10 day course of Penicillin tablets. 2 tablets taken 4 times a day on an empty stomach. Normally, such grounds would be incredibly inconvenient but my appetite has jumped out of the window and hit every obstacle on the way down. In the past week I've worryingly lost a lot of weight  and it's just too quick and very unhealthy. My head is looking a bit big in proportion to my body and my elbows look particularly pointed, my shoulders and my decolletage are jutting against my skin.

A closer look at the hideous white blobs and you can see the stubborn, disgusting lining on my tongue

Four days later I began to feel so much better already, my temperature was back under control, only spiking in the night if at all, the dribbling has stopped completely (hooray!) and I want to graze here and there, my appetite hasn't caught up with my eyes- when I feel hungry I plate up a normal portion size of food, but when I sit down to eat I'm unimaginably full after two or three spoons, but today is the first time I haven't fallen asleep in the day, my head is clear and I feel mostly good! Using the torch on my phone and a mirror I'm still on 'tonsil patrol' they had very large white spots on them that today for the first day they look slightly, slightly smaller.

UPDATE 23rd May 2014
I had blood tests from the doctor for a different issue entirely and my liver function came back as slightly abormal, the doctor (A different one from the GP who diagnosed me with Tonsilitis) told me that I in fact had obviously endured... Glandular Fever.
A whole different issue entirely. By this point my symptoms are long gone and my weight is slowly gaining back onto my body so it sort of doesn't make a difference to me either way. The only sad thing is that Penicillin has absolutely no impact on Glandular fever so I took that intense course, and my poor body took a medicinal battering for nothing!

This was all a very long winded way of explaining my absence and my upset that I was not able to pre film so many fun videos over the Easter break. I'm behind on all blogging, videoing platforms, but I am healthier! It's such a shame when little inconveniences like this happen and knock us off our feet. Similarly, I know the internet is full of health stories, people love to explain their ailments, it's a bit therapeutic to write it out I must say! But my story didn't resemble any other about tonsillitis that I read, I never considered my symptoms as tonsillitis and so delayed much longer than I should have getting medical intervention, maybe you're in bed right now struggling to look at the computer screen because it burns, and your head is muzzy and your throat feels like it's swollen into your ears. But you're contemplating 'battling through' anyway, I'd urge you to be kinder on yourself, not to consider yourself a nuisance to the doctor and not to underestimate how severe the pain can get!

50 shades of... well not a lot really

So I'm a little, well maybe a lot late on this summer read bandwagon as it's now basically winter, but what can I say? I've been busy and it wasn't until I moved away from home and everyone around me is talking about 50 shades of grey that I decided maybe there was more to it than it first seemed.

So, one poor roomates trilogy is going through it's paces like no book should, they've been passed successively down a line of seven of us and there's a motivation to keep reading as the person in the queue behind you wants you to simply hurry up so that they can read your book.

Yes, this is what really happens in a girls flat.

So I'm reading, and not a lot is happening, I keep reading and not a lot else happens... keep reading and nope... still nothing.

Some people (I live with some of these people) are infatuated with Mr Grey

I am waiting to fall in love with this mythical character and I haven't and if it hasn't happened yet I don't think it ever will.

He just seems clumsy more than mysterious

and emo more than intellectual which leads me onto another gripe with this book. There seems to be a whole lot of telling the audience that this is what this character is like, but no showing us.

We are told that Mr Grey is wonderfully intelligent and succesful and incredible, but nothing he does or says demonstrates a particularly superior intelligence, nor the skills to be successful in business. Instead we assume that he is because the author tells us that he is, and actually all he seems to do relating to work is to answer the phone coldly saying "Grey" give a one word answer, then hang up. His work seems to resemble a secretary directing calls to the appropriate departments not an entrepreneurial machine.

The realtionship, is the other part of the book that we are supposed to fall in love with, but it seems very self indulgent on Greys part, and unhealthy on Ana's behalf. It's not the kind of relationship a couple should strive for, it's laced with flaws that mean that kind of relationship would not be strong and so full of trust like the book claims, because unfortunately we are humans who have basic needs in a relationship to feel wanted, accepted like we can trust, be happy, be confident, supported and loved.

Perhaps that's the appeal, it's an impossible relationship that has got readers obsessed, something that would never work in real life, so the more that people can't have it- the more people want it?

I know, I know it sounds like I'm slandering this book to the ground, and perhaps I'm misinformed, perhaps the other two books that follow suddenly make this first book make sense, and it all clicks into place, and then the infatuation begins...maybe

But I don't know if i can bring myself to pick up the next book. I wonder if perhaps I am opposed to books that need another book to 'make sense' - a book by itself should be a stand-alone great story in it's own right.

Another part of me is sad that women have gone crazy over a book of this genre, and that we've not all read in a wave of womenkind an empowering or inspirational story that has shaped how we act and changed our thinking to kinder, happier and more loving.

So you had a bad day?

I read this great quote once that said "Don't let a bad day make you think you have a bad life"

Another influence for me has beena  book by Katie Piper titled 'Beautiful'
Since the day I began reading it  any time I feel as though I'm having a bad day, I remember the most horrendous day of this ladies life and suddenly nothing seems like it's so bad after all. Katie's story is similar to reading a personal diary that documents her life from naive beginnings right through to the mile stones in her recovery, it's very raw and gripping and until the point of a horrendous acid attack that melts away the face that was making her a name in the land of glitz and glamour television. The reader is plagued with the sense that everything is going to end 'tomorrow' but you keep reading to find out when 'tomorrow' is.
The part of the story that has imprinted in my mind even more vivdly than the acid attack itself, is her description of the nightmares that followed. They are described in a way that made it feel as though the nightmares were being woven into reality and coming to life around me, I was completely visually absorbed into Katie's world at that time.

Many memoirs adopt a type of victim approach, an element of seeking out sympathy and I believe this is what sets Katie Pipers story apart. Adament from the start that she would not be seen as a victim, this experience was just adding another layer to her character and a development of her personality. As a whole it was wonderfully refreshing and not just 'another tragic story'.
There is something that everyone could learn from Katie's story. She reminds me that a bad day isn't so bad afterall.

So you've had a bad day?